The beginning (1)

One can never know what tomorrow brings, what life has got for them. Neither did the two girls, whose lives had changed the day they met. They were completely different, the exact opposites of each other, yet a strong bond formed between them in a surprisingly short time.

At that time, Monika was just beginning to build her career in the Bundeswehr, Germany's armed forces in Munich. She was lieutenant, with many goals such as earning other people's respect, showing everyone what she was capable of and prove herself and her family that she wasn't just an ordinary girl. Despite being a woman, she was just as tough as any other man of her rank, but she was infamous for being the strictest of them in the area. Strict, but fair at least. Her greatest dream was to become not Lieutenant but Major Beilschmidt with time and she swore to work towards it with all her power. That's why she had left her home and her family in Berlin years ago, to study and work for her goals in peace, away from those who would only discourage her.

To strangers she looked calm and confident, however, the fact that she didn't speak unnecessarily and didn't enjoy small talks combined with the usual icy stare of her cold blue eyes made her appear unfriendly. She didn't mind it though because she prefered peace and quiet around her and her life was full even with only the few people she needed to communicate with. She was an attractive, young woman, tall, with short blond hair and a strong, curvy body, with her plump breasts and round bottom she would have attracted even more men's attention if she wouldn't have hidden them under the loose pants and T-shirts she prefered to wear. It had never been her intention to impress anyone with her looks, even though she had a shape that many women could only dream of.

Feliciana was nothing like Monika. At first she appeared as an adorable Italian beauty who never stopped smiling, she was sweet as honey and as gentle and innocent as a fawn, and even her dark brown eyes made her resemble one, along with her long hair that she dyed a light shade of reddish brown and she usually tied it up in a ponytail. She simply loved being around people and having short, meaningless convesations and chit-chats, that's why she prefered having jobs that granted her work with others. She came a long way to Munich. In Florence she started working in her family's bakery but when she felt the need for an adventure while she was young, she traveled all the way to Bolzano, where she found a theater where she could make use of her golden voice and learn German intensively. From time to time she felt like a true primadonna during the months she spent singing in Bolzano. She had also learned how to act better there. When she grew tired of the life of an actress, she made her way further to the North and decided to work in an Italian café, where she became a waitress. The guests loved her for always being so cheerful and she kept the place alive with her constant concerts while she served meals and cleaned tables,she was so full of energy and life, some people barely wanted to believe it was humanly possible.

She loved people and she loved men. Seducing them and luring them into her bed could have been called one of her hobbies, and she had all the means to do so. She was thin but just as attractive as Monika if not more, only in a different way. She wasn't embarrassed in low-cut tops, blouses or dresses, short skirts or high heels, she was confident and sexy whenever there was a man that had caught her interest. She wasn't someone who was afraid of or felt ashamed after a one night stand, she simply enjoyed the adventures. She was a passionate yet cautious lover, she always made sure she would have fun and stay safe at the same time. And whenever she wasn't on a hunt for another man, she still dressed and acted femininely, she was a beauty whom a lot of men wanted to have but none of them could hold very long. Even the way she spoke German with an Italian accent spiced her exotic appearance.

Around that time, Monika liked going to restaurants, good quality meals helped her relieve the stress and relax for a while. One day she chose the restaurant where Feliciana worked and the waitress couldn't avoid her attention. With just the enthusiasm she talked about the food, she made Monika smile and it was something that not many people could do. She had won the lieutenant's heart easily, especially after she started talking to her in a softer voice and after the first conversation they had.

"Excuse me. I hope you don't mind me asking," the Italian girl started, her eyes shining with excitement, eager to know the answer, "are you actually a soldier?" She asked softly, hoping not to cause the guest any discomfort but she couldn't help her curiousity.

"Yes, I am," Monika replied coolly, wondering why she would ask.

A big smile spread across the girl's lips.

"That's amazing!" She exclaimed, trying to keep her voice low but since she felt as if she would have met a celebrity, she couldn't hide her excitement perfectly. "I've always admired people like you. I'm so glad we've met! My name's Feliciana. Or Felicia, shortly," she offered Monika her hand.

"Nice to meet you, Feliciana," Monika shook her hand shortly with a faint smile on her face. "I'm Monika."

"I'm happy to serve you, can I bring you some tiramisu? It's on me," she grinned.

"Thank you, but I can't. My diet."

"Oh... And how about a cup of coffee then?"

"I accept. Thanks."

"Give me a minute!" Felicia stormed off to the kitchen and Monika could do nothing but smile at the situation.

She didn't think she would taste the most delicious coffee she had ever drunk in her life when the waitress returned, but in the end she couldn't deny the fact that it was better than anything she had tried before. That was when she knew she would return to the place and she made sure to give Felicia a tip that covered the price of the coffee and some more.

Felicia's coffee really did the trick because Monika came to the restaurant every once in a while, she decided it was worth putting up with the hyperactive waitress for the coffee she made from time to time. That way, she had her coffee and Felicia had her to talk to and ask about her job. Monika answered her questions in a rather tightlipped way but every insignificant little detail seemed to excite Felicia. When the soldier got bored of being interrogated, she turned the conversation around.

"Let me ask now. Were you born here?" Monika changed the subject carefully.

"Oh, no, I come from Italia!" She replied with a big smile.

"Italy?" Monika hummed, thinking it was just a little mistake she made in her speech, since sometimes the girl would speak broken German, but she never seemed discouraged when someone corrected her.

"No, Italia," she sang, with the correct Italian pronounciation, almost laughing. "You know, it's just like this, my mother has a name too but I will always call her Mama."

"I can't argue with that," she chuckled.

So Italia, it is. She liked the idea so much, she decided to make a nickname out of it for her. Luckily, the Italian beauty had no objection against it, all she did was laugh when the next time they met, Monika greeted her with a 'Hello, Italia.' And the more they met and the more they talked, the more they had learned about each other.

After a while Monika noticed that she wasn't the only one to get more attention from Felicia than the other guests. There was a man whom she never missed a chance to greet or talk to, but there was something about the situation that unsettled Monika. She found it interesting that Italia treated him completely differently from anyone else in there, since she spoke to him in a rather humble and careful manner, as if she were scared of him, yet she rushed to him every time he came there.

He couldn't have been older than Felicia but she could guess why she seemed to be intimidated by him. The young and good-looking man prefered black clothing, he dressed elegantly and radiated confidence with his appearance. He walked among the people as if he were superior to them, and he acted coldly towards everyone except Felicia. He seemed to be someone who lived by their own rules, someone who didn't like to be crossed. The man seemed dangerous. Monika could see that every time Felicia left his table, she wasn't herself for a while and that made her very worried. She wondered if he had ever done anything to her that made the waitress act like that.

She watched the man from the other end of the room, trying to figure him out from the distance. But as if he could have sensed that he was being watched, he slowly turned his gaze upon her and a smug smile spread across his lips that gave her chills. He had eyes of the same color as Felicia, but while her eyes radiated warmth, his gaze was cold. She couldn't read his expression, that smile could have meant anything and it really bothered her. She looked at Felicia who was walking back to her and she ordered another cup of coffee. Her instincts told her to beware of this man.




After losing interest in her latest partner, Felicia decided to ask Monika to watch a movie with her, since she didn't want her weekend and the movie tickets to go to waste. Monika eventually agreed to go with her, she thought a small break from work could be nice after all, and she hoped they wouldn't talk much during the movie anyway. Surprisingly, Felicia turned out to be better company than Monika expected. She acted calmer, maybe because this time she didn't have to play the role of the wonderful waitress. She loved talking but Monika could now see that her head wasn't completely empty, she was actually an intelligent person with positive and smart thoughts. She talked about acting, the theater, the importance of career and lifegoals, and Monika found herself interested in all the things she had to say. On their way to the cinema they shared their opinions and views, and despite the differences, they found themselves getting along more then they would have thought. Opposites attract seemed to be a true saying in their case. They started admiring each other for the traits of the other one, Monika envied Felicia's spontaneity and carelessness while Felicia adored how strong Monika was on her own and how cool she could stay.

After the movie Felicia invited Monika to go shopping in the nearest mall, where her hyperactive and crazy side came to the surface again. She got so excited as she was browsing through dresses, tops and lingerie and chattering loudly, Monika actually felt embarrassed from time to time. She mostly kept quiet, answered Italia's questions shortly and pretended to be interested in pieces of clothing she would have never worn of her own free will.

"Aren't you buying yourself anything?" Felicia asked suddenly, finding it weird that Monika found herself nothing while she already had three blouses, a dress and two sets of lacy underwear in her basket.

"Um." Monika looked away with a little frown. "These  aren't really my style, you know."

"Oh..." She hummed, her excitement dying down. "You're right. I've never seen you in anything but cargo pants and T-shirts before. Wouldn't you like to try something on anyway? Let's see..." With a big smile on her face, Felicia quickly searched for something moderate, yet pretty top that would fit Monika just right. In a few minutes she handed Monika a navy blue, close-fitting, short sleeve blouse and pulled her to the fitting room.

Sighing, Monika put the blouse on and walked back to Felicia, who gasped before a big grin spread across her face and opened her arms.

"Look at you now! It doesn't match your pants but with a pair of jeans, it would look perfect! And your chest looks definitely bigger, too."

Monika crossed her arms and rolled her eyes.

"I don't think it matters... I don't like showing it."

"I wish I had your size, you know. And many other girls do. You look great, I don't think you should hide yourself under loose clothes."

"I feel more comfortable in those."

"Don't you feel comfortable in pretty clothes? You look great in this one."

Monika just sighed. She thought it to be useless to argue over something as small as this, she let it go and dressed back into her T-shirt. In there, she thought for a while before she left the fitting room. It's been a long while since she was last complimented on her looks. Maybe she was right...

"Alright, I'll buy it but don't bother me with this again."

Felicia grinned.

"Let's get you some jeans and I'll be quiet."

Monika highly doubted that, but when they left the mall, she was carrying a few bags for Felicia and one for her, with the blouse, a pair of dark blue jeans and small necklace Italia bought her.

They made their way to Felicia's flat, while Italia kept talking and talking and Monika listened, nodded and hummed in approval. For helping her take the bags home, Felicia promised her friend a cup of great Italian coffee, since she loved showing off her kitchen skills to her guests and this time was no exception. She had a talent for cooking that often amazed others, she was way beyond a beginner cook's level. There was just something about the way she used knives that always caught their eyes. She never seemed to care about the 'don't play with knives' rule, she seemed to enjoy singing happily while twirling a knife and stabbing it into a wooden board when she no longer needed it. Of course, she used the kitchen knives for their original purpose too, she could cut the ingredients like an expert. If her friends didn't know her, they would think she's secretly some kind of maniac.

Felicia opened the door and for a second she was surprised to see the lights on. So she didn't get there first.

"Oh," she gasped softly and continued talking somewhat nervously. "We won't be alone."

"Who's here?"

"My cousin," she replied shortly and made her way inside, Monika just followed her quietly but she could sense Felicia's uneasiness.

Stretched out comfortably in an armchair in the living room, a man had been waiting for them. With a bored expression, he rested his cheek in his palm, while his right arm was hanging at the side of the armchair, slowly twirling a small dagger between his fingers. When the girls stepped inside, he slowly lifted his gaze at them. It was the man from the cafe, wearing black as always.

"Ciao Luciano," Felicia greeted him with a smile.

"I thought you were out with some guy," he replied coldly.

"Yes, that was the plan..."

He hummed and straightened up in his seat.

"I didn't like him. I wanted to give him a warning but this makes it a lot easier." An insolent smile spread across his lips before he took a closer look at Monika who stood behind his cousin. "You're dating women now?"

Monika simply raised her brow, she tried not to give herself away, that chills ran down her spine as she watched this man move and talk. Without doubt, he was dangerous but she couldn't tell whether he would be able to do her harm. She could barely read his expressions, the guy was hiding his thoughts so well, it actually scared her but she knew she had to play it cool, just like she used to.

"No, it's nothing like that!" Felicia laughed. "This is Monika, my friend, she always comes to see me in the cafe. And he's my cousin, Luciano. He came to Munich with me."

"Freut mich," Monika said in a steady, low voice.

"Piacere," he made a gesture with the hand he held the knife with in the air and chuckled, the smirk never leaving his face.

"I'll go make us some coffee then!" Felicia quickly excused herself and rushed to the kitchen.

After she left, Luciano slowly rose from his spot and hid the dagger. Monika clenched her fists as he slowly approached her. There was something unsettling about the way he moved. He walked quietly, almost without a sound, his moves were relaxed, yet he still seemed ready for any surprise, he was just like a quiet predator inspecting his prey. Monika didn't like the idea of anyone preying on her, she watched him just as closely as he did. When he walked past her with a smirk to walk around her, she turned to face him and followed him, never leaving eye contact. He chuckled.

"You're a tough girl, I see."

"I'm a soldier, it's only natural."

"Oh," his smile grew wide. "Interesting. Tell me, have we met before?"

"I wouldn't call it a meeting."

"I'm sure we've met in my dreams before," he purred and lifted one of Monika's hands to his lips and kissed it softly. Her hand was tense as she tried to hide her disgust, she slowly pulled it back and walked towards the couch to take a seat.

She might have heard Luciano murmur something while she had her back turned on him for a second, but she decided to ignore it. Much to Monika's relief, Felicia came back soon with three cups of coffee, then she sat down next to her and continued talking. Only the fact bothered her that the man was sitting there in the armchair, quietly sipping his coffee, just listening to their conversation, even though sometimes he seemed to be deep in thought rather than listening to Ita's chatter. Monika often felt his eyes on her and she did her best not to show any sign that she knew he was watching her. She wondered why he was doing this.

Eventually Luciano excused himself and got ready to leave.

"You're not staying?" Felicia asked softly.

"I'll be out tonight," he replied, fixing his jacket at his neck and walked towards the front door. "Goodnight. We'll meet again," he looked back to smile at their guest but all he got was a frown in return before he left.

"He doesn't seem like a party person," Monika stirred her coffee in the bottom of the cup.

"No... He isn't." Felicia's voice has suddenly changed. She sadly stared at her empty cup, unsure what to say next.

"Where is he going then?" She looked at Italia.

Felicia closed her eyes.

"I don't want to know. Sometimes it's better not to know about everything," she put a smile on her face and leaned back comfortably.

"He gives me chills," Monika mumbled. "And you act different around around him. Feliciana, does he hurt you? Threaten you?"

"No!" She protested immediately.

"So what is he anyway?" Monika asked with a frown and sighed. "How can you live with a man like that?"

"I have no choice," Ita said softly. "Wherever I go, he follows me." She sighed. "But if he didn't... I'd be dead twice now."

"What are you talking about?!"

"I know, he seems... different. But he takes care of me. He saved my life. He is..." She closed her eyes slowly. "My protective shadow. And he's serious when he tells someone he would kill for them. And that's why I don't want to know what he's doing when he's out of my sight."

Monika didn't know how to react. This girl was basically living with a psychopath of sorts who made her life miserable.

"Hey... If you need help with anything, call me or come to my place. I'll take you there when you're free so you'll know where I live."

"Thank you. Well, I could use some chit-chat in the evening when I'm bored," she giggled, making her guest smile as well.

"Seriously, I mean it though. I'm here for you."

"Thanks. Would you like some snacks?"

Monika left rather late that evening. She didn't want to leave before she made sure that Italia was alright and at the same time she hoped she wasn't acting this time. Then she didn't know they wouldn't meet for a while.



The next time they met was another evening, when Monika was working late and she picked Felicia up as she was escaping a terrible date. They hadn't seen each other for weeks by then, and Monika thought her companion would immediately start talking endlessly but all she did was quietly fasten her seat belt and lean back with a sigh. It was obvious that something was wrong with her, and without asking much, Monika drove them to the small house she was renting in the outskirts of the city.

"Some men are just horrible," Felicia sighed, a can of beer in her hand. They were sitting on the couch, drinking and talking because she really needed it. Monika let her stay for the night and gave her a T-shirt to wear to bed which was rather big for her.

"You're probably right."

"I mean... He took me on a date when he's already married, how wrong is that?"

"Disgusting," Monika mumbled, not really sure how to comment on Felicia's rambling.

"Hey..." Felicia's naughty smile returned as she turned her gaze back on Moni. "Are there any decent men in the army?"

"I guess there are," she replied coolly along with a shrug.

"Oh, are there strong and tall and handsome men who need the company and the comfort only a woman can give them?" She chuckled.

"Probably."

"Then why aren't you dating one of them too? You could probably choose from many."

"They're my colleagues."

"Oh. And what kind of men do you like?"

"I don't know."

"Just don't tell me you've never dated anyone before."

Felicia got actually worried for a minute hearing how indifferent Moni was towards men. She even seemed slightly annoyed and she was looking away, clearly uncomfortable with the subject.

"Or do you prefer girls?" She asked softly. "Or neither? Are you frigid?"

"Italia, please!" Monika raised her voice, losing her patience and trying hard to control herself. Sexuality was a subject that bothered her a little more than it should have. Since she had already accepted the fact that no one would ever truly like her that way, she wasn't interested in going out or having a one night stand with anyone. She simply wanted to be left alone and work and focus on her goals.

"Sorry!" Felicia looked away, somewhat ashamed but more worried that she might have hurt her friend.

"I'm not like you," Monika added softly after a while. "I'm a soldier and that is exactly what I want to be."

"I see... But, I think I could fall for you though."

Monika frowned and looked at Ita who was smiling again.

"If you were a man of course."

"Ita..." She hummed. "I'll never understand you."

"It's not that complicated though. I love flirting, I love the attention I get, I love men, spending time with them and go to bed with the best ones. It must be a kind of addiction by now," she giggled. Moni just shrugged it off.

"Whatever pleases you, little nympho."

Felicia kept smiling widely, making no objections, since Monika wasn't entirely wrong.

"Is there anything you love about men?" She asked with a naughty smile.

"Well, I," Monika hummed, inspecting the beercan in her hand for a few seconds. "I used to really love beating them up during my university years."

Ita moaned painfully, it was obviously not the kind of answer she had been expecting but her frustrated reaction made her seemingly heartless companion smile.

"Forget about it, we'll never be the same." She handed her a new can.

"I guess you're right. And we don't need to be."

The two continued talking and drinking until late at night. After midnight Monika retreated to her bedroom after giving Felicia a pillow and a blanket to sleep on the couch and a T-shirt that was too big for her to sleep in. They said each other goodnight, but just before she could have fallen asleep, Monika felt her mattress move and Italia lay next to her.

"What is it?" Monika mumbled, raising her brow but not opening her eyes. "Afraid in the dark?"

"I don't like sleeping alone," Ita giggled as she wrapped her arms around Moni's and held it close to herself.

"You drank too much." Monika sighed softly, not very fond of the idea of Felicia invading her personal space.

"I guess so," she murmured and pressed her cheek against Monika's shoulder.

The bothered host parted her lips to speak but changed her mind before any words came out. She wanted no unnecessary conflicts and then it wasn't the worst thing to happen either. Italia was warm and the way she held her arm felt strangely comforting. Monika convinced herself to see the bright side of it, after all no one has ever wanted to sleep in the same bed with her and she had already given up on searching for that kind of affection, yet here it was now - in a way. Felicia snuggled her happily, her smile not fading the slightest. She was probably the only one who didn't think of her as a cold, unattainable person to rather avoid.

With another little sigh, she raised her hand slowly and patted Ita's thigh.

"Sleep well, you crazy."

"You too," Felicia whispered before she finally fell asleep.

In the morning she was holding Monika's hand, making her not want to get up so early this time.